(Royal Australian Automobile Association of South Australia) I have always loved your work and plan to keep it that way. But we need to have a serious talk about going too far with your CRM* and learn to deal with the upcoming inversion of VRM*.

You see, I have always been happy at membership renewal time (proudly watching the years of continuous membership climb past 27). I often tell stories of how your roadside assistance, free strip maps, house insurance / security systems and even free legal aid have saved the day for me. Both my cars have been insured with RAA insurance since new, thankfully we have never had to do much business. But lately I have been telling rather different stories to anyone who will listen – because in my greatest hour of need to date I was ‘CRMd’ (and I did not like it).

It all started last Friday with a very distressing call from my wife saying she had smashed her little red car near my place of work and could I come and help please. Before bolting out the door I checked my wallet for my RAA membership card – remembering how the RAA helped me out of a similar nightmare 10 years ago when a clerical error rendered us un-insured. As soon as we had made the environment safe, decided that an ambulance was not needed to get her to medical attention (just over the road) and swapped details with the other driver I sat down to make arrangements for tow away to an RAA approved repairer with a loan car available. Confidently grabbing my RAA gold card, I dialled the largest phone number on the back – Road Service (because that’s what I figured I needed). This is when the CRM system(s) kicked in – firstly to get me out of the queue for roadside assistance and into the queue for car insurance assistance.

Then my confidence turned to horror as the CRM system prompted the poor operator at the insurance call-centre to validate my identity then check my account status before offering any assistance. After a brief wait on hold I was greeted with the grim news that my payment had not been received on time for a renewal due yesterday and that I would not be covered! It was at this point that my attitude toward RAA Insurance switched from very positive to absolute rage. I would need to make my own arrangements for removal of the vehicle. I WAS hoping the RAA would be able to determine which of their approved repairers had a loan car available and would organise a tow-truck to take the car there while I took my injured wife to hospital. We decided to leave the car on the side of the road and walk to get medical attention. Oh, yes, and to top it all off the last words of the RAA Insurance operator were a McDonalds style up-sell (doubtless prompted by the CRM system) ‘Is there anything else I can help you with today’..

The rest of that day was spent in clerical hell as I scrambled to try and find an optimal pathway through a process I did not understand. Found a nearby repairer who was prepared to guarantee loan car for my business but wanted me to push the vehicle 201 meters down the road for some reason that sounded dodgey to me. Found a bunch of forms to fill in and got some legal advice. Returned to the scene to get details of witnesses. Took legal advice and decided to ring state government towing service and get car taken to most reputable repairer (both RAA Insurance approved and HONDA recommended but 6 week wait for loan car). Arranged for relatives to take wife from doctor to x-rays and then in person to police station for mandatory police report. Back to car, call towing service, specify repairer of choice and wait. Ensure repairer will stay open until car arrives, greet tow truck operator, ask for lift to repairer and watch as he loads car onto truck. After a hasty flash of paper work including my signature he announces I will need to find my own way home as he is returning to depot. So there I was feeling utterly cheated and powerless:

• No assistance from RAA Insurance only a question mark over my cover
• Lost opportunity for loan car because of fear and uncertainty about insurance cover
• The word ‘Depot’ written next to my signature on a form marked with red WARNING notices ‘you must specify place of repair here’
• Already half a day’s paid work lost and probably more to come as I now need to sort out this mess before getting any assistance from RAA Insurance
• A splitting headache and a very sore and sorry wife

What did I feel like doing? Being a web-geek who understands the future of marketing, the search terms ‘Kryptonite locks‘, ‘Sky Handling Partners‘ and others leapt to mind. I wanted to destroy the RAA brand and I knew exactly how to do it. But I talked it over, many many times. The story got more and more bizzare as the dust settled and details began to emerge. More conversations, none of which were positive, more legal advice – stay calm, focus. More time spent on clerical work and administration – less paid work with my clients.

So, RAA Insurance, I have written this humble blog post in the hope that one day we can sit down and talk about this in a constructive way. My wife is seeking an appointment with the most senior person in your Insurance business who will listen – to explain our circumstance. I need to clear my head and get back to work (especially if I need to fund all repairs myself). Most importantly we just want some assistance with this very complex process which is your business and should be none of ours.

Definitions:

CRM – Customer Relationship Management (The systems and process behind all those fancy call centres, streamlined bill payment and transaction processing).

VRM – Vendor Relationship Management (The future/flipside that will emerge as we your ‘customers’ develop our online voice)

Fang – Mike Seyfang